If one thing works in S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 2, it’s the incomprehensible name generator for random NPCsAn exhaustive-ish list of its finest goon handles
An exhaustive-ish list of its finest goon handles
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Because your life partly depends on relieving slain foes of their belongings, S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 2 encourages you to get up close and looty with these blokes, meaning you end up spending a lot of time reading goofy nicknames. I thought I’d pay tribute to the best ones I’ve seen so far, even if the majority of these honours will need to be given posthumously.
Ivan Magnet, who attracted one too many bullets.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Sashko Sick, hence the mask.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Tolyan Funky, a gifted dancer if his AI ever let him leave this wall.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Hosha Kickass, who didn’t.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Borko Decibel, silenced forever.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Slava Proton, staying positive.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
David Powerlifter, earning the maddest gain of all: eternal rest.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
Alex the Gherkin, a nice guy but kinda fucking up the naming conventions.
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Lyonya Degree, first class with honours, honest.
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Kostya Lexicon, now a man of few words.
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Ian Barrel, ageing no longer.
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And lastly, Ivan Thermos. His body’s not even cold yet.
Image credit:Rock Paper Shotgun/GSC Game World
